grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
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