She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
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