I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize
