I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
