at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Randomize
