WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize
