He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
