what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Randomize
