You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Randomize
