you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Randomize
