she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
