He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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