Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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