Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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