sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
