Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
