My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
