uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
i think i have herpe
just one?
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
