haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
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