I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
bring money and cleavage
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Randomize
