you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Randomize
