They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
Randomize
