ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
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