can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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