How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
did i just pee glitter
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
