The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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