I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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