just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
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