I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
