so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
