youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
