Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
