whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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