are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
