you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
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