What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
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