so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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