Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
