Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
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