so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
