I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Who did Billy Mays play for?
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Randomize
