went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
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