He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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