yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
