She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
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