my mouth tastes like poor choices
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Randomize
