why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
