dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
