forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Randomize
