Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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